Hear me on this.

We all have hard stuff, trauma, new life circumstances and stress but we have options.

Some people will cling to their hard stuff and use it as a way to describe who they are. Because I’m going through (fill in the blank with your truth) I get to not engage. I get to not prepare. I get to not show up. I get to not try. I get to be lazy. I get to drink more. I get to eat more. I get to pull away from people. The list goes on and on.

The other option that people take on with new phases of life is that they hide from it. They pretend everything is “Fine.” “I’m fine” “We are fine” “ Everything is fine”…except for it’s not. Things are actually bothering you and you are not aware that all the crappy things that you don’t like in your life are often all the same things you have not dealt with. #truthbomb #samsies

You can pretend your truth is not there or you can cling to it but deep down you know that neither option is working for you. From one trauma ridden mamma to another I can assure you that if you don’t make peace ✌️ with your truth’s of life, you will never get anywhere.

Yes, I know, you feel stuck at the bottom of a mountain and you feel like everyone else is rising to the top seamlessly and effortlessly. Other people seem to standing on the top of a marvelous marriage mountain or a job mountain or their family is always rocking life, or a monetary mountain. You see others as standing on top of a mountain of success that looked easy for them to climb. What you don’t see is that they are standing on top of a mountain of failures, setbacks, limiting beliefs, heartbreak, stress and trauma. The people at the top of the mountain decided to keep climbing and get to the top of a mountain instead of being buried underneath it!!! 🏔

It’s all about perspective. 👀 You get to decide how you see your stage of life. Finding good among the struggle does not mean you embrace the struggle.

My daughter getting hit by a car while holding my hand is trauma. I can’t unsee that. I can’t change my nightmares, anxiety, Kendall’s injuries and the major life changes we had to take on as a family.

I do know that with a change in perspective it is possible to find meaning with the crappy things that life throws at you. With a new perspective, you can change a “my life is standing still moment” into “I’m going to the top of this freaking mountain moment.”

When I only focused on the BAD that was happening in my life, I lost sight of my own life and anything good that was happening around me. I lost site of MY gifts and talents. I only focused on what was taken from Kendall’s gifts and talents rather than what was remaining. I saw my other kids as stressful rather than life giving. I saw my stress as a reason to stay in bed, gain weight, not take care of myself, yell at my kids, not go to the doctor myself, tell everyone “I was fine” and live my life feeling like I was on the verge of a heart attack. (insert a photo of me hyperventilating at all times)

This is what I know. If you never focus on the good in life and only the bad then you have pumped the brakes on your life and you now think you have a broken car that won’t bring you any farther. Not you, not this time!! YOU HAVE NOT COME THIS FAR TO ONLY COME THIS FAR. 

This time you will NOT gain 50 lbs. You will not start closet drinking . You will not sleep all day. You will not stay riddled with anxiety. You will not under nourish yourself. You will not go on without sleeping. You will not live a life wanting to start a fight or to cry with every conversation. You will not take out on the world what you can control with just a change of perspective.

You have the power to decide that all your stress, hardships, trauma, and poor choices are stepping stones to build your own freaking mountain of awesomeness 🏔. You decide, right now, to step into who you were created to be despite that fact that the crap of life is still in your presence. This time when you decide, you decide to not let the set backs weigh you down but rather use your life’s truths to inspire those around you and improve your own life.

What if these stones in your life are not there to trip you up but rather to build you up, hoist you up, see a new vantage point or find new people to take your journey with?

YOU DID NOT COME THIS FAR TO ONLY COME THIS FAR!!! I encourage you to get up and show up so you can let others see that life after “sucksville” can be built and it can be pretty awesome.

Do not miss out on the power of perspective that you have within you. Don’t let your present circumstances stop you from getting to where you were going. Keep moving forward. I know I am. Want to join me?